We've thought before about what the message is that is carried in Step 12 of Program. Is it merely that the addict need no longer drink, gamble, over-eat or whatever? Or does the phrase "this message" in Step 12 refer to the spiritual awakening that we have had? Is the Step suggesting that we carry the message of the spiritual awakening to other people -- both in and out of Program?

Regardless, when we first start to practice Steps 10, 11 and 12 on a daily and dedicated basis, the results we get are so remarkable that we can be very tempted to turn into evangelists for this spiritually based way of life. From this point of view, discovering the real meaning of the last three Steps can be very much like first coming into Program and beginning our recovery. Remember how in those early days we wanted to share what we had found with other people -- regardless of whether they needed it, sometimes regardless of whether they even had an addiction problem?

If we are so enamored of our new way of life that we start to tell everyone we know about the changes that have happened to us, we are in for the same sad surprise that we encountered when we first came into Program. We run the risk of boring our friends to death, regardless of whether they're in Program, "ought to be" in Program, or don't need Program. The fact is that most people simply don't want to hear about a spiritual way of life that is lived out in practical terms. There may be a variety of reasons for this, but the reasons aren't important. Just like the basic AA or other 12-Step program, a life based on Steps 10, 11 and 12 isn't for people who need it but for people who want it.

And so, when others ask us about this way of life, we need to be careful. We answer briefly the questions we are asked. If they ask another question, we answer that. And when they stop asking questions, we stop talking about it, remembering the words of A.S. Neill: "No man is wise enough to tell another how he ought to live."