I am fascinated by the story of the Prodigal Son in the Bible. When I first came into Program and started to practice the Steps, I saw myself as the Prodigal Son. I'd wasted my inheritance in riotous living, and then had -- for some reason -- come to my senses.

But after some time, I started to act more the part of the Prodigal Son's elder brother -- you know, the "good boy" who stayed at home and did everything his father wanted him to do. I'd spent several years in Program clean and sober, and although I'd got a great many concrete rewards that I'd never had when I was engaged in my active addiction, it somehow didn't seem enough. I'd understood that if I worked hard I'd get recompensed, and it seemed to me that other people weren't recompensing me as much as they should for all the labor I'd put in. I believed that I'd be looked up to, and it seemed to me that I didn't command the sort of respect that I should, given all I'd achieved.

It was only when I started to work the last three Steps that I understood who the role model is in the story. It's not the elder brother, certainly; but nor is it the Prodigal himself. It's the father -- the one who accepts his sons just they way they are, neither condemning when they make mistakes, nor praising when they walk the right path. The father can see himself in both his sons -- he knows he has the potential to be either of them, that he is his sons and they are him. Only when I work the last three Steps on an active daily basis do I start to see that I am one with all the other people in Program, those who have just arrived and those who have been around for years, those who are working the Steps and those who aren't.